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Kiss Me, Captain book cover

Kiss Me, Captain Reviews

by itsvlada

7.4/10Overall

Spice

Spice level 4 of 5

A sapphic skating slow burn where the enemies used to be each other's best friend.

The verdict

All five columns agree on the same strength: the premise upgrades a familiar trope stack by making the rivals former best friends. Character Study and Plot Lab both single out Emily's dry, deflecting first-person voice — the motel bedspread she refuses to investigate, the mother who called the move a mistake and drove her to the airport anyway — as proof the book can do character work alongside tropes. Trope Report likes how the figure skating setting makes the forced proximity structural rather than contrived: same rink, same captain, same Nationals deadline.

Where they part ways is speed. The Heat Check notes that chapter one is all stored energy — the 18+ rating and the promised steamy scenes are a destination, not an opening move. Binge Verdict calls 165 completed chapters a genuine commitment, while Plot Lab argues that length is exactly what a slow burn needs. This is for readers who want a long, emotional sapphic campus romance with a Bully Love edge and a self-discovery arc at its centre — and who are happy to let the thaw take its time.

Best for

  • Sapphic enemies-to-lovers fans
  • Slow-burn and sports romance readers
  • Readers who love self-discovery arcs

Maybe not for you if

  • You want explicit heat from chapter one
  • You prefer short books you finish in a sitting

Five reviews, five angles

Our reviews are based on the book's premise, its opening chapter and reader data from the My Passion app – no spoilers beyond the blurb.